


A Song of Saints and of Sinners

by thepocketsizedauthor



Category: Le Silence de La Mer (2004)
Genre: Eventual Sex, F/M, Love Confessions, Post-Canon, Post-World War II, Secret Relationship, Slow Build, World War II
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:42:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22296511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thepocketsizedauthor/pseuds/thepocketsizedauthor
Summary: Jeanne mourns the loss of her beloved Captain, but they were never destined to be apart for long.
Relationships: Jeanne Larosière/Werner von Ebrennac
Comments: 39
Kudos: 81





	1. Chapter 1

Jeanne did not stay at home for long.

Her beloved grandfather died in the winter of 1944 and everywhere she looked she could sense him. Surrounded by ghosts she feared she might lose her mind.

She considered joining the French resistance, but the thought of killing another kept her from the gates, instead, she chose to nurse, receiving a brief training before being sent to Switzerland to assist the French forces beating back the staggering German forces.

Jeanne was well-liked by her superiors, known for carrying out orders efficiently and with care. Unlike some of her fellow nurses, she did not distract herself with romance or taking leave, her work became her world. One young doctor liked her perhaps a little too much, but she could keep him at a reasonable distance without much effort.

She was awoken from a well-needed sleep by the siren, her fellow nurse Solene urging her, “Come, Jeanne, we have much to do”

Pulling her half-sleeping frame from her bed, she hurried to the main ward which was already crammed with men in various stages of death and injury. Amongst the pleading in her native tongue, she heard a new cry. Those of German soldiers.

“We have them from both sides” Solene called, helping to lift a man onto a bed. “This whole unit was caught in a blast, completely isolating them from the main army”

Jeanne joined her fellow nurses and doctors in treating the wounded, cleaning gunshots scars, holding down limbs as the men were treated with and without anaesthetic. She hated their screaming but had learned to drown it out.

After five gruelling hours, those that had survived lay unconscious or asleep. Jeanne was doing her final rounds before noticing a Nazi Private out of bed. Initially, she addressed him in French but seeing him give no response, she tried her broken German.

“You, stop, get in bed” she called.

The young private had a severe arm injury, tripping and falling to try and reach a sealed-off area of the ward.

Jeanne caught up with him, crying out as he pushed her away to reach one of the men in the beds.

“This area is not meant for you” she called.”This is for officers only!”

“Captain” the young man cried, collapsing at the side of a bed, “Please Captain, you cannot leave us”

“Private” called Jeanne, “Come away”

The young man would not move and Jeanne had not the strength or willpower to force him. Fortunately, two young doctors had become aware of the commotion and came to retrieve him.

Jeanne held open the curtains, allowing them to drag the man back to his bed, dulling out the noise of his screams until three words struck her like a fist. “Captain Von Ebrenac!”

Her eyes flew to the man lying on the bed. “Werner?” she whispered under the breath.

As she got the young man settled again, she asked him as best she could. “Your Captain?”

“Yes, Captain Von Ebrenac” the young man replied. “Is he alive?”

“He is alive” assured Jeanne. “What unit are you from?”

“9th Panzer” replied the man. “Russian front”

Her heart seemed to fall to her feet. Her eyes flew back to the curtained area and nothing could stop her from going inside.

She approached the bed with caution, unsure of what she would find. Two other officers lay asleep next to him, but she managed to seal his bed from the others, using rails of curtains.

Jeanne tentatively lifted a candle to his face, unaware that he had been roused by the noise of his fellow soldier.

His eyes snapped open and met with hers, both of them startled then suddenly overcome.

Werner stared at her, his thoughts fogged by medicine and fatigue. It was a moment before he finally whispered, “Jeanne?”

Hearing him speak sent her over the edge, unable to speak she heard another nurse call her name and quickly left him, despite his desperate implores to stay.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the support on this story! I confess I did not expect it, but I am grateful none the less.
> 
> Please feel free to leave kudos and any reviews :)
> 
> Happy Reading, 
> 
> Sarah x

Jeanne could barely breathe. She flew back to her room, past her fellow nurses who muttered amongst themselves.

She pressed her hand against her chest, feeling such emotions swell inside her. A man she had loved and mourned had reappeared in the chaos which had first brought them together. 

Since his departure over a year ago, she had heard nothing. Not one letter or fragment had reached her. Jeanne was left to weigh up which was the lesser of the two evils, the possibility that he had died, or returned to the arms of another.

Now he had entered her life again in unsuitable circumstances, if gossip in her small town was malicious, imagine trying to disguise it amongst a hospital more divided than ever.

A knock on her door altered her, she quickly wiped the tears from her face and called, “Yes?”

A young doctor entered, “Jeanne, I saw you running, you seemed upset”

She tried to smile, “I-I felt sick” she lied. “I did not mean to cause you any distress”

He took a step towards her, “I know, but I do worry about you sometimes”

“That is kind of you Doctor Girard” she replied.

“I have asked you to call me Fabien,” he said.

“I know” nodded Jeanne. “But it is not correct, especially as you are a Doctor”

He looked down at his name badge and took it off, “There, I am not a Doctor”

“You are more than your name badge” she reminded.

“As are you,” he said with a smile.

He took a step closer and Jeanne moved away, “Please Sir, I am keeping you from your duties”

Before he could reply, the head doctor of the hospital had heard the conversation as he passed by. “Girard? What is this?”

The pair both spun to the door, standing upright as the imposing figure walked in.

“Dr Marchant, please forgive me, I noticed this nurse was unwell, I wanted to ensure nothing was seriously wrong” replied Girard.

Dr Marchant looked down at Jeanne, “Is this true?”

“Yes, Sir,” she said.

“Girard where is your name badge?” demanded Dr Marchant.

He looked down to the empty spot on his uniform, “I shall replace it immediately”

“Not before I give you a demerit for a lax in uniform” barked Dr Marchant. “I expect better of you, this shall not be repeated”

“Yes Sir” replied Girard.

“Is this nurse in a fit state to return to the ward?” demanded Dr Marchant.

“After a short break for some food, yes Sir,” said Girard.

“Good, nurse go to the food hall, Girard my office, now” he ordered, stepping aside to allow them to pass.

Girard tried to catch Jeanne, but she quickly turned and moved down the busy corridor.

“I’d keep your concerns to our patients Fabien” observed Dr Marchant, reading the situation with his sharp eye. “Shut out any such emotions until this war is done”

Girard looked longingly after Jeanne, “Yes Sir”

-

Jeanne returned to the wards after eating a little, staying far away from where Werner was positioned.

She cleaned wounds and fed the dying, she had a particular talent for soothing those close to death. After nursing her poor mother and then her grandfather, Jeanne was no stranger to the words the dying wanted to hear.

A sudden commotion alerted her and she heard orders barked, “A transfusion, immediately!”

The young doctor had shouted from the area of the German captains and she instantly abandoned her post. Grabbing the equipment with a fellow nurse they flew past the curtains, joined by another doctor. 

The captain was not Werner, but he sat up with the two others, clearly in distress. Their friend had torn open his stitches and was bleeding faster than it could be remedied.

Jeanne caught eyes with Werner for a moment before her training overtook her. The two doctors took the equipment, whilst Jeanne tried to soothe the captain.

He was crying out in agony, but the tears in his eyes were full of fear. Seeing Jeanne beside him a bloodied hand gripped her arm. “Ilsa?”

This was not the first, nor the last time Jeanne had been mistaken for a lover far away. The very first time she had denied it, confused and frightened. But the man grew hysterical so another nurse stepped in, lying through her teeth that she was his wife, allowing him to peacefully slip into death.

She traded glances with her fellow nurse who nodded, trying to hold him down.

“Yes” replied Jeanne, using her broken German. Kneeling on the floor beside the bed she smiled. “I am here”

The Captain was astonished, breathing through pained gasps he whispered, “Did you get my letter?”

“I did my love” she replied, her hand gently holding his own. 

“And little Hans, is he well?” he asked softly.

“Yes,” she smiled. “He missed you”

Jeanne looked back at the doctors who were unable to find a strong enough vein. The blood loss was too severe and could not be remedied. They shook their heads and urged her to keep him talking.

“Ilse” he cried. “I am sorry”

“No,” said Jeanne, brushing her fingers through his hair. “Do not be sorry”

The man’s eyes started to glaze over, he tried to keep speaking but a slow trickle of blood escaped his mouth before the rattled breathing finally ceased.

Jeanne took a deep breath and closed the man’s eyes, before rising to her feet. The nurse beside her patted her shoulder, making the sign of the cross over the man’s body. 

Werner and his comrades stared at their deceased friend, one piping up in anger. “Why did you not do anything! Bastards! You let him die!”

Werner silenced him. “Peter go to sleep, don’t open your mouth again” 

Jeanne turned as she heard him speak, but could not bring herself to reply.

-

Later the night, the death of the Nazi Captain had caused problems. The hospital was to save as many high ranking soldiers, to be used as prisoner of war exchanges. The privates could die in their thousands, but Captains were worth their weight in gold.

Dr Marchant had called all doctors and nurses in the ward to discuss their options.

“The death of Captain Reinmann was unexpected and unacceptable” he barked. “Do you care for our victory? Is this preventable loss of valuable life nothing to you?”

“With respect,” said Girard. “What can we do for them that is not already being done? As Doctors, we want to care for them, but I cannot deny that the death of a Nazi brings me satisfaction”

“How small-minded you are Fabien,” remarked Dr Marchant. “The world does not revolve around your own interests. Something must be done”

“What do you suggest Sir?” asked the head nurse.

“I propose that someone volunteers to care for those Captains with serious injuries, to perform duties to ensure that something like this does not re-occur,” said Dr Marchant. “This doctor or nurse would be assigned a Captain and remain with them until they are fit to be sent to prison or until we win the war.”

“Who is the most serious?” asked Girard. “Not all of them suffered serious injuries”

The Captain by the name of Von Ebrenac suffered a severe leg injury and will require much attention” replied Marchant, glancing at his notes. “Who will come forward as a volunteer?”

No one in the ward moved.

Marchant sighed and cried. “Please do not all rush forward!?”

Jeanne went to raise her arm but felt Girard hold it in place, frustrated she pulled it from his hand, now wanting more than ever to help Werner. “I volunteer Doctor Marchant”

Head turned and mouths whispered as Jeanne was called forward.

“What is your name?” asked Marchant. 

“Nurse Larosiere, Jeanne Larosiere Sir” she replied.

“Well, Jeanne,” he said. “Are you capable?”

“Quite capable” she nodded. 

Fabien protested, “Doctor Marchant, Jeanne is a great asset to this ward, to our French soldiers, she does not need to dishonour herself in such a way”

Marchant looked down at Jeanne. “He speaks for you?”

“No, though he thinks he does” replied Jeanne.

Fabien cheeks coloured as murmured laughter circled him. “I speak the truth”

“And yet I do not believe you,” said Marchant.

Girard, seeing he had lost turned and left the ward, muttering under his breath.

“Now Jeanne, this Captain will require your complete attention, every six hours the dressings on his leg will require changing, he must be washed, food brought to him and daily exercise. Can you schedule this around your other duties?”

“Yes Sir, I would like to be active within this ward also” replied Jeanne. "My duties here can remain unchanged"

“But when will you eat and rest?” he asked.

“Like our soldiers do Sir” she replied. “When I can”

Marchant gave a small smile. “Very good, you shall start first thing tomorrow”


	3. Chapter 3

Werner stirred in the early hours of the morning, crippling pain gripping his lower leg.

He desperately reached for the small bell that was kept by his bed, his shaking hand twitching the small ring of hope.

Jeanne was outside in the ward, having just relieved a fellow nurse. Her ears perked at the small ringing, slipping quickly into the officers quarters.

She caught eyes with him, his pale sunken face so unlike the fair complexion that had greeted her. 

“Captain what ails you?” she asked.

His fingers released the bell, instead, reaching out to her face. “Jeanne”

“Captain” she ordered. “Where is your pain?”

Her coldness ailed him worse than his pain, “Leg”

She paused slightly before lifting the bedclothes, knowing he wore little underneath.

Her blushes turned to urgency, seeing his leg deep purple, puss forming at many legions. 

“How long has it been like this?” she demanded, tearing the blanket away.

“A day or so” he muttered.

“You did not report this pain?” she said.

“They’ll take my leg” he replied.

“Prideful man” she muttered, moving from his bedside.

Werner’s hand reached out, grasping her wrist. “Stay with me”

She tore his hand away, “Captain, I am bringing a Doctor”

“Stay, for a moment, please” he whispered.

“Another moment and you will lose your leg!” replied Jeanne sharply.

Frustrated she called for assistance, which came in the shape of Doctor Girard.

“Nurse” he paused, slipping past the curtains. “Jeanne, are you alright?”

“The Captain, his leg requires attention” Jeanne replied, seeing Werner’s eyes locked on her.

Girard was also startled, “Captain, are you so determined to kill yourself in this bed?”

“I can think of better places to die” replied Werner smoothly, gritting his teeth as his leg was examined. 

“The lesions must be drained immediately,” concluded Girard. “Or else sepsis will take you within days”

“Do what you must,” said Werner, seemingly unbothered.

“I hope you have a strong nerve Captain, there is no time for anaesthetic,” remarked Girard. “Jeanne, please gather what I need”

“You will call me Nurse” muttered Jeanne sharply. “Not Jeanne”

Girard gently brushed her arm, “Habit, forgive me”

Jeanne saw Werner’s demeanour change as the sign of Girard’s affection, it was clear whatever ailed him was not only the suffering of his leg.

Whilst she collected the instruments from the nearby cabinet, she overheard Girard's comments. 

Rolling up the blanket he remarked. “Don’t you think Captain, that the French women are more beautiful than German women? Especially our nurses?”

Jeanne felt herself recoil, his forwardness did little to impress her.

Werner replied simply. “If you only measure beauty Doctor, I worry for you when your wife gets old”

“The joke is on you Captain” purposefully placing pressure on a lesion. “I am unfortunately unmarried”

Jeanne awaited Werner’s response with bated breath. “We are both unlucky then”

She turned her head sharply, remembering a woman in a photograph. Was Werner truly unmarried after all?

“Nurse?” called Girard, “Time is of the essence”

Jeanne collected herself and returned to Werner’s bedside.

“You’ll have to brace yourself Captain,” said Girard, cleaning his leg. “Summon that famous German strength”

“A doctor with a sense of humour” breathed Werner. “You must be compensating for something”

Jeanne sat beside Werner, much to his surprise she instinctively took his hand in her own. “Put as much pressure on my hand as you like”

Despite it being solely her training at the forefront of this action, nothing could have felt more right and perfect to have their hands intertwined.

Werner hissed in pain as Doctor Girard pierced his skin, the blood and puss erupted instantly, draining into the bowl beside him. 

Jeanne placed another hand on his shoulder, she may be small of stature but she would not allow Werner to damage himself further. 

Girard worked efficiently and soon the three lesions were drained and treated. 

“You are lucky Captain, Nurse Larosiere is one the best. She has volunteered to care for you” he remarked. 

“Yes” panted Werner, recovering his strength. “So I have been told”

“Nurse, I’ll leave you to clean this,” said Girard. “Call for me, if you need anything”

“Thank you Doctor” replied Jeanne, unclamping Werner’s hand from her own and settling by his legs.

-

The pair sat in silence for some time, Jeanne worked quickly and with care, feeling his warm gaze upon her.

“There Captain,” she said, once her task was complete. “They will need regular cleaning but I am here to do so”

“Jeanne,” he said softly.

Ignoring him she moved away, placing items back into the small medicine cabinet. 

“I feel I must explain myself to you, I have done wrong by you” he called quietly.

“You do not need to explain anything to me Captain” replied Jeanne sharply. “You have not hurt me in any way”

Werner was startled, however, determined. He watched her move to leave without a word and purposefully raised his voice. “Do not leave this room like we are strangers Madam”

Jeanne stopped in her tracks, glaring back at him, burning with his obstinance. She heard murmurs from behind the curtain and heat flushed to her cheeks. “Are you so determined to hurt me like this?” she replied.

“I would not hurt you for the world and yet I fear I have” he replied, his eyes remorseful.

Jeanne gave a small sigh and traced her steps back to his beside. “What do you wish to say Captain?” she asked softly.

“I should have written to you” confessed Werner. “I wrote and destroyed many letters to you, none of them could truly express my words. I was a coward to deny that my silence would hurt you because I know it did”

“You are mistaken” she replied, politely “You do not owe me a thing”

“You saved my life that day” snapped Werner. “I will not forget it or your obvious distraction”

Jeanne was ruffled, “I-I would not have seen you perish in such a way because…” her speech halted.

“Because?” he asked eagerly.

No sooner had she opened her mouth to reply, another nurse slipped through the curtain.

Jeanne hurried away from Werner, knowing she had already stayed too long.


	4. Chapter 4

Jeanne cursed herself for her lack of strength. She has so convinced herself that Werner was no longer locked in her heart, but he was seemingly more entwined in her soul than she had ever imagined.

After their last encounter, she regretted ever offering herself for the duty of caring for him. How could she care for someone when each time he would push her to think or say things that would only bring them both more suffering.

Werner could never know what he truly meant to her. That very admittance would be the beginning of the end. 

But she would not abandon her post as his nurse, she could not allow Girard the victory nor the explanation why. She would simply avoid speaking to Werner, just as she had done in France, her silence would speak for her.

-

Werner was suffering and deeply confused. 

To see her so obviously hiding her heart from him was worse than the pain of his wounds. 

Though he had never expressed the depth of his true affections, surely his actions, however, subtle would have not escaped the female eye.

There was so much he needed to say to her, so much he must explain. But there was no time or place to do so. His fate was unknown but he would not risk her dismissal or mistreatment for his sake. To see her dishonoured in such a way would destroy him. 

He concluded the only way to speak would be to write to her as if she were a sweetheart far away. The letters would be short and most likely require destroying but it was necessary. Now without the fear of death and the relentless pounding of the battlefield, perhaps his mind could finally piece together all he wanted to say.

-

Solene and Jeanne both took a breath of fresh air during their breaks. The roof of the hospital was one of the few places you could find any peace, so many of the nurses took full advantage. 

“I got another letter from Edward today,” said Solene happily. “He had returned to England on leave”

“For how long?” asked Jeanne.

“A month for rehabilitation” replied Solene. “But this time he’s promised to speak to his parents about me”

Jeanne smiled. “Are you?”

Solene laughed, “No not engaged yet. He has warned me that his family is wary of strangers, especially foreign nurses clinging to their English son”

“As soon as they meet you they will adore you” urged Jeanne. “And your English is better than most in this hospital”

“It's just with this bloody war coming to an end, I can finally dream again” confessed Solene. “Edward is not the man I thought I’d marry but I would never have imagined the war would turn the world upside down. Everything is susceptible to change and I am ready to embrace it”

“Your tenacity is enviable,” remarked Jeanne. “I know of nothing I can do once the war is over”

“Men will be flooding home eager to wed and bed a beautiful girl” smiled Solene. “You are bound to find one if you haven't already”

Jeanne grew defensive, “Why do you say that?

Her friend raised an eyebrow. “I meant no offence Jeanne, I was simply curious”

“Forgive me” urged Jeanne. “There is talk of Doctor Girard and me, and I despise it”

“He is worth pursuing,” said Solene. “He will have a profession after the war, you'd be happy with him”

“But I do not feel anything for him” protested Jeanne.

“From what I have seen, you have not given him a chance to let you feel anything,” remarked Solene.

“What would you have me do?” replied Jeanne. “Throw myself at him?”

“No,” remarked Solone. “But just don't be so cold all the time, you won’t find anyone to love you with that icy expression you wear”

“I do not have an icy expression” muttered Jeanne. 

“You are doing it now!” cried Solene. “You furrow your brow, your eyes harden in place and you mutter, it's insufferable. Especially for a face as fine and delicate as yours”

“What is there to smile about Solene?” asked Jeanne impatiently. “There is nothing but death in this place”

“Hope and the prospect of love” reminded her friend. “Edward is what keeps me going, find someone who makes the idea of dragging your body around this hospital worth every unbearable second”

“I don’t believe that person is Doctor Girard,” said Jeanne. “He is a good man but not for me”

“If you say so” sighed Solene, finishing her cigarette. “But you’ll break his heart like this”

“His work is his heart” concluded Jeanne. “Once I am gone from here, he won’t think about me”

“I can’t tell if that's innocence or arrogance” smiled Solene.

“Neither,” said Jeanne. “Simply fact”

-

“I do hope that this move will not further increase an already heavy workload Nurse,” said Doctor Marchant. 

“Not at all Sir” replied Jeanne politely. “If you deem it best for the Captain I will happily oblige”

It had been decided that due to a heavy infection rate Captain Von Ebrenac along with the two other remaining officers would be moved to several isolated rooms. The military was keen to prevent any further complications and was holding Doctor Marchant personally responsible.

“He will practically become your sole patient Nurse” reminded Marchant. “This ward will be at the bottom of your list”

“Very well” agreed Jeanne. “When will they be moved”

“As we speak” replied Marchant. “But I would not worry, the Captain will be settled by the time you visit him”

“Am I to complete my rounds with him alone?” she asked.

Marchant’s gaze softened. “Any mistreatment will be taken very seriously, I can provide a porter to remain near should you feel uneasy” 

“Oh, Doctor” confessed Jeanne, “You misunderstand me. I am not qualified should things go wrong, what Doctor should I report to if I am concerned?”

“Doctor Girard has insisted he be your superior in this case” replied Marchant. “He told me he knows of the Captain's wounds and would be happy to treat him”

Slightly frustrated Jeanne nodded, she would just have to keep putting up with Girard for the time being.


	5. Chapter 5

Werner was unsettled by this move.

Not only would he miss the companionship of his fellow men, but a Nazi alone in a French hospital was also a recipe for disaster. He clung tightly to his pocket knife more closely than before. In his eyes, this was trench warfare again, and he was weaker than before.

His only glimmer of joy came in Jeanne and her visit every three hours.

She refused to speak about anything except his condition, she changed and dressed his wounds, helped him relieve himself much to their mutual embarrassment and would administer his medicine.

Werner had grown used to her voice, but her silence was almost soothing. It reminded him of her home and the sense of peace they had there. He learnt to watch her again, admiring her delicate figure in her uniform, and the tiny wisps of her soft hair peeking from under her cap. If this was to be his eternity, he had little to complain about.

Jeanne was almost through with her visit when he called, “I wonder before you go, would you help me?”

“Of course Captain” she replied. “I am at your service”

“My jacket,” said Werner. “It is lost to me and I would see it returned if possible”

“Captain-I” she began.

“It has letters, documents and photographs” urged Werner. “I beg you, inquire to its whereabouts”

“Captain, most clothing is incarcerated, with any belongings removed and unless asked for soon after arrival are destroyed, I am sorry” replied Jeanne.

“Jeanne,” he said softly. “Please”

His eyes were so desperate and pleading, she had learnt to avoid his gaze lest she should dare to get lost in them. But to see him smile again would be her greatest joy. Even if it meant finding things that would hurt her.

“I will try” she agreed, “But I cannot promise you anything”

Werner gave a grateful sigh, “Thank you”

“Til later” replied Jeanne, slipping out of his room.

* * *

“You want to do what?” cried Doctor Girard. “Jeanne you have lost your senses!”

“Doctor Girard please” hushed Jeanne. “I am not asking for anything unorthodox, I am simply obeying the wish of Doctor Marchant that the Captain's needs should be met. This is one of them”

“You would sacrifice hours, no almost days, searching for a Nazi’s personal effects?” scoffed Girard. “Jeanne you are better than that”

“I would do the same for any Frenchman” protested Jeanne. “Please give me the key to the storage room”

“For a Frenchman, I would happily agree” replied Girard. “But you would rather spend your days caring for the enemy than be in the ward where you belong”

“Do I need to ask Doctor Marchant to remind you that it was my choice to do this?” demanded Jeanne. “Do not try and intimate me Sir for you certainly cannot scare me away from doing my duty”

“Your sense of duty has been fogged by a good looking Nazi” snapped Girard. “I see the way he looks at you, and what eyes you make at him!”

Jeanne’s eyes grew cold and pointed, so much so that Girard retracted his remark. “Forgive me, that was without taste or respect”

“Please may I have the storage room key?” said Jeanne plainly.

With a great sigh, Girard unlocked a drawer and handed her a set of keys. “I do not need to remind you to return them, I know your sense of responsibility”

Jeanne took the keys, “No Doctor” she replied. “You do not know the first thing about me”

* * *

The trek to the hospital storage was a long one.

Jeanne explained herself countless times to various people who stopped her. Units did not usually cross over each other's boundaries, especially not the nurses.

Eventually, the smell assured her she was coming to the right place. It was a stench of mildew and dried blood, mixing with other things she dared not consider to dwell upon.

She unlocked the final door and pulled the light string, several dim light bulbs shone overhead and revealed piles upon piles of rotting clothing, all ready for the incinerator.

Jeanne thanked heaven that a sense of organisation was present, and after a moment or two of searching; a large pile of captain’s jackets lay in front of her. Some were badly burnt and torn, others soaked in mud and fluids. A far cry from the smart grey uniforms that sought to invade the world.

Tying her handkerchief around her face, she began to rummage through pockets and search for medals.

She could remember Werner’s jacket like her own reflection, but a clear mark would be his Iron Cross.

Scouring material was painfully slow, especially as many jackets had only burnt remains tucked away inside pockets. But after almost an hour she felt something different. Inside a scorched jacket was a leather-bound notebook, no larger than a hand. Jeanne knew immediately it was his. It had been engraved, an elaborate W.V.E stretched across the face of the cover.

Jeanne’s thumb traced each letter before her curiosity overcame her. Tucked amongst the diary entries and army logs were various photographs and letters, all seemingly from a Greta, the same woman who had written to him in France. The infamous picture of her beautiful face slipped out from a page, and Jeanne studied it carefully and with much resentment. A small gasp left her lips as another photograph came into view. A small boy, no older than ten years, a copy of Werner in almost every way, standing proudly next to his mother, outside a rural family home.

Betrayal crept up in her throat but she would not allow the tears. It was true after all, Werner was never really hers, he had a family of his own.

One quite complete without her.


	6. Chapter 6

Jeanne arrived back at Werner’s room, carefully holding his jacket.

His face lit up as he saw her, “It is found?”

“Yes Captain” she replied plainly. “I hope everything is accounted for”

“I am beyond grateful” he smiled, relieved to have been reunited with a treasured possession.

Jeanne stood back, watching him scour the jacket pockets, emptying each one as he went, a small pile of letters mounting up on the bed.

When he found his notebook however he pressed it to his chest. “You do not know what this means to me Jeanne, thank you”

“I am at your disposal Captain” she replied.

He leafed through the pages, collecting each photograph and admiring them. “Would you- would you please stand this one up by my lamp?” he asked, passing her the one photograph she dreaded.

Trying to hide her distaste she agreed, adjusting it so Werner could look at his family from his bed. “You must care about them very much,” said Jeanne, watching his eyes gaze at it.

“Yes, Greta and Werner, they are my world” he sighed.

“Werner” she blurted before her cheeks went scarlet.

“Yes,” he smiled, seemingly still unaware. “Named after me”

“You must miss them very much” added Jeanne, emotion swirling within her.

“I’d like you to meet them one day,” Werner replied. “They would adore you”

“I don't think that is wise” she replied.

“Why ever not?” he asked.

Jeanne stumbled over her words. “You...they are your family!”

Werner also seemed confused, “Forgive me, have I offended you in any way?”

“No” she lied, “I am sorry I am very tired.” She glanced over at the clock on the wall. “I must go now, I will back later”

“Of course,” he said softly, his brow still furrowed in puzzlement.

* * *

Reluctantly Jeanne approached Girards office, no doubt he would inquire as to the contents of the jacket and try to read her mood.

“Come in” he called, hearing the knock at the door.

“Your key,” said Jeanne, quietly approaching his desk.

“I trust you found what you were looking for?” he remarked.

“Yes,” she replied, laying the key down and heading for his door. “The Captain was very pleased. Thank you, Doctor”

He stopped her from leaving, “Jeanne stay for a moment”

She sighed, “Doctor I am busy, please what is it?”

Girard got up from his desk, “Have I hurt you in any way?”

Jeanne’s hand turned the door handle, not prepared to answer him.

“The hospital is talking about us,” he added, watching her pause. “I wondered what you made of it”

“Any rumours concerning yourself and I have not been spread by me” replied Jeanne plainly. “I am sorry if you have been subject to gossip on my behalf”

“Why would I be sorry?” laughed Girard. “I had hoped the rumour had come from you?”

“I have never indicated any such attraction or care for you Doctor Girard,” said Jeanne. “Nor do I plan to do so”

“You are so cold Jeanne,” he replied. “For some reason, it does not deter me as it should”

“I am not well versed in expressing myself” she replied. “I do not consider myself attracted to you, I am sorry if you feel different”

“Have you been in love before?” asked Girard.

Jeanne paused, “Yes...but he left”

“I am the one who should be sorry” he replied. “But I promise I won’t leave you...if you give me a chance to love you”

“I have made myself plain Doctor,” said Jeanne. “I am here to work and serve my country, once this war is done I am going home. Then I will decide if love is something I want, not now and certainly not with you”

“You speak with such force, but yet with such a lack of emotion I can not tell if I should be angry or not?” remarked Girard.

“I do not wish to stir any emotion in you” replied Jeanne. “I am sorry if my words hurt you but they are true”

“Must I wait then?” he asked.

“I do not want or do I desire to keep you in any kind of suspense” she replied. “Feel free to let your heart wander elsewhere”

Girard looked utterly stunned. “That is all you have to say to me?”

“Yes, good afternoon Doctor” replied Jeanne, before swiftly leaving him alone.

-


End file.
